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2002 Sep 08 02:41

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Re: [vox] [OT] Nigerian spam
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Re: [vox] [OT] Nigerian spam

On Sun, 8 Sep 2002, nbs wrote:

> Sorry for the off-topic post, but I really can't wrap my head around this.

Get a more malleable head...
> I've been getting 'nigerian spam' pretty much daily lately.
> I got three today.  Two were within 5 minutes of each other, had the same
> subject line, but came from different people (and had pretty much identical
> stories, except different names).
> My question is - Does _anyone_ in their right mind fall for these?

First off, Carlins rule: Take the average idiot you meet, and realize if
thats the average, half the world is stupider than that.

If people didn't fall for the scam, then people fall for scamming the scam
(selling the dumb idea for someone else to do)

> I mean, once you've seen one, the rest are just cliche!  It's like a running
> joke!  I almost wonder if the people sending them aren't actually trying to
> make (steal) money, but rather just being trolls and spreading the crap like
> chail letters, just for giggles.  ("Har har, I sent this stupid e-mail to
> 5000 people."  "Right on, dude!  Let's send another version with more typos!")

No, trolls usually have more direct interest in annying you.

> I can understand people falling for porn spam ("ooh! more porn!") or
> maybe even some of the weightloss/breast enhancement/etc. spams.
> (People are pretty sensitive in those areas, and more gullible.)

I don't need bigger breasts. Really. Mine are pretty firm and I don't see
a need for enlargement.  But man, let me tell you, I'd love to refinance
my mortgage...that is, if I had a house (I get insurance/mortgage spams
now by the digital deli full).
> But those are _products_.

Yeah.  And I have a bridge to Atlantis off the coast of Arizona to sell

> The Nigerian spams are just bizarrely-written e-mails "send in the greatest
> security and confidentiality" (err, yeah... plaintext e-mail - THAT's secure).

Those emails are not written to cater to the people on this list. They are
written to people who make WebTV users look like prolog programmers by
comparison.  As elitist as it is, there are some dumb dumb dumb ass
sumbitches who should not be allowed near a keyboard.
think of all the dumbass warning signs that you see and realize they are
probably there not to reinforce common sense, but because someone did
something so stupid, it mandated their installation. My favourite was
changing vacuum bags and seeing (I kid you fucking not):

"Please do not eat contents of bag"

Someone dumb enough to eat 4 pounds of dustbunnies, old food and insect
particles and who knows what else, is most certainly dumb enough to want
to take some cash from a Nigerian refugee with a couple mil floating

> Am I giving the typical AOLuser websurfing schmoe too much of a benefit of
> a doubt?  Is humanity really the lost cause that late-night informercials and
> "Mr. Jon Savimbi's" e-mails make it out to be?!

Bill. Humanity was lost after Celine Dion made a comeback. For all we
know, Tuesday armageddon will be here and Barbra Streisand + John Ashcroft
will merge and become the Beast and tattoo 6's on our foreheads and make
us sing in rounds the choruses to every song from the Yentl soundtrack.

If not? Hey, theres always spam......


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